Top 10 signs you know the school year is ending:<\/p>\n
10.\tSchool busses start carrying salve on board for the third degree burns resulting from vinyl seats reaching 37,000 \u2103 by 7 am.<\/p>\n
\t9.\tToo short to be considered \u201ccrayons,\u201d you now have a box of wax finger paints. All in Burnt Sienna color.<\/p>\n
\t8.\tNotes from the teacher are now scrawled on the back of Expedia and Priceline search results printouts.<\/p>\n
\t7.\tEntrees on the hot lunch menu include candy from the leftovers in the teacher\u2019s lounge and the \u201cYou\u2019ll get it back in June\u201d drawer.<\/p>\n
\t6.\tThe only matching pair of socks in the entire fourth grade is between your daughter and the kid who slept over last weekend.<\/p>\n
\t5.\tBackpacks have deteriorated into back-of-knee packs.<\/p>\n
\t4.\tThe amount of times you hit the snooze button has grown exponentially throughout the year; you now only awake to the alarm of your own sobs when you realize you have to return to school after Memorial Day weekend.<\/p>\n
\t3.\tBecause of #4, your kids have a laminated tardy slip.<\/p>\n
\t2.\tCar line has become merely a suggestion.<\/p>\n
And the number one sign that school is almost out?<\/p>\n
Commercials start alternating between Sylvan Learning Centers, Back to School sales and top shelf vodka.<\/p>\n
\u00a92014 Tracey Henry<\/p>\n
<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Top 10 signs you know the school year is ending: 10. School busses start carrying salve on board for the third degree burns resulting from vinyl seats reaching 37,000 \u2103 by 7 am. 9. Too short to be considered \u201ccrayons,\u201d you now have a box of wax finger paints. All in Burnt Sienna color. 8. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":[]},"categories":[2],"tags":[86,66],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3NIOM-93","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":208,"url":"http:\/\/www.suburbandiva.com\/2013\/08\/12\/signs-of-premature-education\/","url_meta":{"origin":561,"position":0},"title":"Signs of Premature Education","date":"August 12, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"As I sit here on the eve of the first day of school, which has crept earlier and earlier each August until it seems as though the 4th of July is closer than Labor Day, it occurs to me that the local School Boards may be suffering from an embarrassing\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Lunch Combination Special : column and recipe"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.suburbandiva.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/IMG_2010-225x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":551,"url":"http:\/\/www.suburbandiva.com\/2014\/05\/10\/happy-mothers-day-for-real\/","url_meta":{"origin":561,"position":1},"title":"Happy Mother’s Day. For real.","date":"May 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"My discomfort for Mother\u2019s Day is well-documented. Over the years, I\u2019ve explained that since my own mom passed away 13 years ago, ownership of this day has not been possible for me. This has eased slightly in recent years, or at the very least, worn the edges of the day\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Column"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":997,"url":"http:\/\/www.suburbandiva.com\/2021\/07\/25\/4-corners\/","url_meta":{"origin":561,"position":2},"title":"4 Corners","date":"July 25, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Today, we visited 4 Corners National Monument, and while I feel like we should talk about 4 Corners I don't think 4 Corners is comfortable with us talking about it. 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